STAMPED METAL WASHERS

SOMETHING NOT TO DO IF YOU ARE TRYING TO QUIT SAYING THE OCCASSIONAL CURSE WORD

even if they are in the Bible.

As you may have heard, we are going on a little roadtrip hur (here) in a few weeks. I have been wanting to make washer necklaces since last summer, but never got around to it.

I have all things roadtrip on mah (my) mind and realized it was my perfect excuse to make some of these rill cute things. (Plus everyone has been making them for more than a year, and now they are practically out of style, so it's time for me to jump on the wagon!)

I went to Harbour Freight and picked up the stamps. They look like this:

The store smells bad and the back tire on Svetlana was low. I filled her up at a scary gas station nearby.

I went to Lowe's and combed through 25 drawers to find 30 frickin' same size washers that were below knee level so I had to bend over the whole time and it killed my back.

I spent twenty minutes measuring the holes and diameter and trying to figure out what size they were so I would know what code to put on the plastic baggy. When I went to check out I was chased away by a checker at the first register who was waving his arms yelling, "NO! NO! Big order! No!"

I was like, I have 30 washers ....

Then I realized maybe he meant the guy already checking out.

Don't worry, I finally found someone who would take mah (my) money.

Then I went to WalMarche and bought knee hi's to make the necklace part. I stood in line for another 25 minutes while I waited for the checker to exercise her right to take as long as she wants as she slides the items over the scanner.

You've seen these, right?

If you factor in mah (my) time it's the most expensive 33 cents I've ever spent!

All that previous stuff leads up to ... setting (sitting) on mah (my) carport floor in 103* heat and bein' glad (for the 1000th time) that mah carport is behind mah house and not facing the street.

Take a hammer and put the greasy, slidey stamp on the washer and start banging the snot out of it.

Check out mah letter - perfect!

Next letter - slip!

Dang it!

Repeat.

Curse.

Remember you aren't cursing and curse when you remember.

Repeat.

Get 15 useable washers out of thirty.

In the air conditioned house, get a big drink of ice cold water and stick your head in the freezer 'til it cools down.

Take a Sharpie marker and smoosh the sharpie ink into the letters (some will get around) and then wipe it off with a baby wipe. It makes the letters more noticable.

Now go ahead and cut up dem (those) knee hi's into 1" strips.

Loop them on the washers and here you go:

Some things to note - the stamps are greasy - I guess the keep them from rusting - so if you are prone to wiping your hands on your legs, like I am, be sure not to! 'Cause when you do, you might be tempted to profane.

Check your box to be sure you have all your letters AND that they are deeply cut. You can see that the "R" on "roadtrip" isn't very deep. I wish I had looked at more sets. I have heard of people not getting all the letters, or the letters being deformed.

The stamps also slide around. GRRRRRRRRR Repeat after me - washers are seven cents each.

DO NOT stamp on tile or carpeted floor, your table top, or counter (especially if it's granite!). The table and carpet aren't hard enough and if you hit tile or granite just right you can crack it. It's best to use good old fashioned concrete.

If you have broken yer (your) tailbone 5 times, take a pillow out for yer (your) tuckus.

If you have a bad elbow on the arm you use to hammer, plan on the elbow hurtin' the rest of the day.

And yer shoulder.

And yer head.

And yer booty.

And yer back.

Use a wide Sharpie and just really smoosh in the ink into the letter grooves. It's so satisfying! You can do a couple before using a wipe to wash the extra off several at a time.

If you want a tutorial that makes it look easy-peasy I suggest this one.

* No actual four letter words were used in the making of dem (these) necklaces. But there was a lot of "dang, fetch, ohmyheck, what the holy scrud, h - e - double hockey sticks, that's frickin, flippin crud!"